if you need immediate assistance DIAL . . . 911

call NCADV  (national) ...........1-800-799-7233

Some things are slowly changing. When I needed help, there were no websites to go to and no one wanted to get involved, especially if drugs were involved. However, you are taking the first step, right now, and at this very instant, by looking for support. It may not seem like it to you, but that frantic, desperate, afraid-to-make-a-move feeling, along with the pounding of your breaking heart, is the signal that your body is sending to you, and that's how you know something isn't right. This signal won't quit. However, the problem isn't 'getting fixed'. You have spent time after time, maybe, blaming yourself or even looking the other way, hopeful that your other half will awaken and come to his/her senses.

If you have children, you may only be coming to the realization that something needs to be done to protect them, and to give them a healthier environment in which to grow, so that they have a fair chance in life to move ahead from a more solid foundation. You may think that they do not notice, cannot understand or see, but children are extremely perceptive, and, just like you and me, they turn this pain inward and blame themselves. Perhaps all of this is very severe, and you are holding your breath as you are reading these words. Or not. Abuse takes many forms.

First of all there is the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. They are available twenty-four seven. There is a national number to call as well as local calls for assistance. From there you will be able to find out about available shelters in your area as well as safe houses. This will be especially important to you if you have children and are concerned about their safety and welfare. You will be informed about the types of services available You will be advised about your choices if you are concerned about financial difficulties.

I will be adding links to this website in order to make it easier for you to sift through important information, stories and types of assistance.

If you need IMMEDIATE assistance, as you feel that your life, or the lives of those around you are in danger call . . . 911

call NCADV (this is the national number) . . . 1-800-799-7233

please check below for a state by state listing.

If you need IMMEDIATE assistance, as you feel that your life, or the lives of those around you are in danger call . . . 911

call NCADV (this is the national number) . . . 1-800-799-7233

   Whatever your circumstances, ABUSE IS AGAINST THE LAW. However, unless you intend to do something about it, no one knows what is going on behind closed doors. Oh, of course people and friends can speculate, your children can become depressed and their emotional upset begins to show in other areas; school, friendships. However, it is only YOU who can make the move to get the assistance that you need to make the necessary changes in your life.

   Remember that YOU can hide for only so long. The pain, sorrow, and suffering that you are carrying on your shoulders for yourself and/or your children is weighing you down. The fears of moving on with your life without him/her in it can seem overwhelming . . . as if it is impossible.

I can clearly, and without a doubt, understand exactly what you are experiencing at this very moment . . . the feeling that you cannot break free. This is a time when you are beginning to experience a separation of emotion and reality. Our emotions can keep us "stuck" and our denial fuels our emotional need to hold on to the familiar, no matter how intolerable it has become for ourselves or those around us.

Logically, but something we do not see when we are in this situation, is the fact that we cannot move backwards. We can only move ahead.We expect ourselves to grow throughout our lives and in our relationships. When this does not happen we stagnate; becoming immobilized and unable to experience growth. However, it is our fears and the shame that we carry living in this situation that keeps us where we are. Life moves on and so must we.

Please read through the information available on this website as often as you have to and any other website offering you eye-opening growth. You will reach out, and when you do someone will be there to help guide you along.